Wednesday, July 28, 2010

The Switcheroo


"The easy confidence with which I know another man's religion is folly teaches me to suspect that my own is also."

Mark Twain
Most people of faith either lack a mechanism for validating and invalidating claims, or they simply suppress that mechanism in favor of a certain belief, a process known as compartmentalization. The compartmentalized belief is impervious to any statement that could be made, any evidence that could be shown, and any proof that could be given which in any way might damage that belief. Therefore, as an attempt to work from the inside out, I present the following:
The Switcheroo
A long time ago God created the universe. He did it in such a way that a very specific process would play out. This process would lead to a beautiful cosmos to look at, and an amazing diversity of life which would yield one of God's eventual favorite species, the human. These carbon-based bipedal primates would have a capacity for intelligence unmatched by their contemporaries (on the same planet at least), and would therefore have a remarkable capacity for good, for evil, for love, for hate, for learning, and for credulity. A rival god named Lucifer swung by once to see what God had created and he coveted it. He was jealous beyond belief at the beauty of this universe and of the creatures that would be in it. So he devised a plan to steal it. Sharing the space was easy enough because both gods are omnipresent.
But that wasn't enough. He wanted the humans. He wanted their minds. The creator god, interestingly enough, didn't care to have the minds of the humans, he just wanted them to use them. Knowing this, Lucifer decided to interfere in human affairs in just such a way, that the humans would create a book which was two-fold in purpose. First, to cripple the minds of the humans and second, to get them to worship him. Lucifer figured this was enough to get the creator god to be jealous of him, purchasing Lucifer the eternal bragging rights which would, in his mind, assuage his insatiable jealousy.
But it didn't work. The creator god had a strong intuition that the humans might overcome the deception. He had read the book that had been written about Lucifer and wagered that the humans would be able to see through the attempt at deception and once again be the creatures they evolved to be. He even noted that some of Lucifer's outrageous jealousy had spilled over into the verses. (There were even some that commanded the humans not to have any other gods before him.) He wasn't going to give Lucifer the satisfaction of caring that billions of humans were going to be worshipping him. So he just folded his arms and observed. He didn't try to stop Lucifer, because he knew it was what Lucifer wanted.
As the millennia passed, it played out exactly as Lucifer wanted. He even had it put in the book that the creator god was not actually the creator god, but the devil, subservient to him in every way. He had set it up such that once the belief took hold, it was virtually impossible for the humans to change their minds.
Will the humans ever emancipate themselves from Lucifer's deception? Will the creator god end up intervening to save the minds of billions? Will any believer be able to freely contemplate this story?
For the conclusion of this dramatic tale... stay tuned.
Here's the question: How can a religious person know that this story isn't absolutely, 100% true, without doubting their own beliefs on the same bases?




4 comments:

  1. This is contrary enough to be my favorite thing ever! I love it

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  2. lol. Thanks! From an expert contrarian like yourself, that's quite high praise.

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  3. Great... Someone's going to start a cult based on this.
    And it will be all your fault.

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